Struggling Authors

There, I've fixed it for you you numpty

Narrator: There was a time, a time before cable. When the local anchorman reigned supreme. When people believed everything they heard on TV. This was an age when only men were allowed to read the news. And in San Diego, one anchorman was more man then the rest. His name was Ron Burgundy. He was like a god walking amongst mere mortals. He had a voice that could make a wolverine purr and suits so fine they made Sinatra look like a hobo. In other words, Ron Burgundy was the balls.

He had a voice that could make a wolverine purr : Brilliant.

Brick Tamland: Any moment now, a stork will come in with the new baby panda. Let's just see if I can see what's going on there.
[looks through the crowd at the panda giving birth]
Brick Tamland: Oh God...
[starts crying]
Brick Tamland: No... I don't understand...
Another Brickism

Ron Burgundy: I know that one day Veronica and I are gonna to get married on top of a mountain, and there's going to be flutes playing and trombones and flowers and garlands of fresh herbs. And we will dance till the sun rises. And then our children will form a family band. And we will tour the countryside and you won't be invited.

Brian Fantana: I think I was in love once.
Ron Burgundy: Really? What was her name?
Brian Fantana: I don't remember.
Ron Burgundy: That's not a good start, but keep going...
Brian Fantana: She was Brazilian, or Chinese, or something weird. I met her in the bathroom of a K-Mart and we made out for hours. Then we parted ways, never to see each other again.
Ron Burgundy: I'm pretty sure that's not love.
Brian Fantana: Damn it.

Yes, they were hard drinking, hard working hard men but they were lonely too...
I wanted to use the "Let's musk up" line again because it's so good, but it would have been cheating.
(What Reg, like Copy and Pasting whole blocks of dialogue from one web page to the other? That sort of cheating???)
OK Conscience, leave me alone now.

For once I'm actually not going to cheat but only because I can't find the quote I want lol. For that reason this may not be word perfect but it's one of my faves:

Champ: I woke up in some Japanese family's rec room and they would Not. Stop. Screaming

You cheated.

Honestly, that's the one time I haven't! I shall do so this time though:

Ed Harken: [on the phone] I have no idea where he would have gotten ahold of German pornography. But you and I are mature adults; we've both seen our share of pornographic materials. Oh, you never have? Of course you haven't, how stupid of me. Neither have I. I was just speaking in generalities. Right. I'll stop by the school a little later, Sister Margaret. Bye.

Ron Burgundy: You stay classy, San Diego. I'm Ron Burgundy?
Ed Harken: Dammit. Who typed a question mark on the Teleprompter?

A short one, but poignant.

Ron Burgundy: Let's go to Brian Fantana who's live on the scene with a Channel 4 News exclusive. Brian?
Brian Fantana: Panda Watch. The mood is tense; I have been on some serious, serious reports but nothing quite like this. I uh... Ching... King is inside right now. I tried to get an interview with him, but they said no, you can't do that he's a live bear, he will literally rip your face off.
[to the Panda]
Brian Fantana: Hey, you're making me look stupid. Get out of here, Panda Jerk.
Ron Burgundy: Great story. Compelling, and rich.

Compelling and rich indeed.

Ron Burgundy: Great Odin's raven.

In the second part he comes out with some great exclamation phrases. The only ones I vaguely remember is, "By Uncle Billy's corncob pipe!" and "By Zeus's beard!"... or something like that.

Uncle Jonathan's corn-cob pipe!
Hot pot of coffee!
Sweet grandmother's spatula!
Saint Damien's beard!
By the beard of Zeus!
Spider-Man's balls, that hurt!

I cheated and looked em up.

I had forgotten about this thread, let us get it started again

Brian Fantana: No, she gets a special cologne... It's called Sex Panther by Odeon. It's illegal in nine countries... Yep, it's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good.
Ron Burgundy: It's quite pungent.
Brian Fantana: Oh yeah.
Ron Burgundy: It's a formidable scent... It stings the nostrils. In a good way.
Brian Fantana: Yep.
Ron Burgundy: Brian, I'm gonna be honest with you, that smells like pure gasoline.
Brian Fantana: They've done studies, you know. 60% of the time it works, every time.

Hahahahaha! Love that bit.

OK, it's still 'on topic' but with a twist.
BFBS, (British Forces Broadcasting Service) used to have a very good programme called, "The Show". There were three DJ's and it was all very witty and droll... No actually it was great and I used to love listening to it.
ANYWAAAY, the bloke in the team, (Wez) was a big Anchorman fan and to kick start the show they did a little Anchorman spin off and put it on YouTube, (which I happen to watch more than television, actually).
So here it is, "Afternoon Delight" by "The Show".
Enjoy...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e1cENytmmTk

I still have no idea what you two are talking about but you seem to be on a roll and enjoying it
However....I did watch the you tube clip CQ and loved it.
It brought back some memories - both the song and the antics they were up to.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ip6GolC7Mk0

Click on that link Tee, and watch a legend.
A legend that is Ron Burgundy - Anchorman !!!